Reading aloud has always been a part of our family culture. From the time I was pregnant with our first, I was aware of the research on the academic benefits of reading aloud to children. I swam in the homeschool podcast waters where I learned how reading as a family creates bonds and forges memories. I understood that reading aloud to my children would fill their minds and hearts with stories that would inspire them to greatness and virtue.
What I didn't expect was how much reading aloud would support us through grief.
Benefits of Reading Aloud as a Grieving Family
When my mom was diagnosed with a terminal illness, we had three small children and were expecting our fourth child. Our entire world was upended. My mom was a part of our daily lives, and we all struggled to accept a reality without her physical presence in it.
During her four months of illness and in the months (years, honestly) following her death, most of our life was stripped away. What remained were the rhythms and habits that had been long-cultivated in our lives. Reading aloud together was one such practice, and I quickly discovered that this intentional investment was worth far more than I could have imagined.
It Offers Stability.
First, the steady routine of reading aloud together gave us something to count on when the rest of our schedule was shaken. We knew that, whatever new thing each day held, we would snuggle up in the evening and disappear into a story.
Reading aloud as a family helped us "feel like ourselves" as we experienced a level of grief previously unknown to us.
It Encourages Connection.
Reading aloud also kept our family closely knit. When we're grieving, it's easy to turn in on ourselves. The pain is so loud. But reading aloud together pulled us out of ourselves and toward one another. We still laughed together, anticipated the plot together, and were delighted together.
Reading aloud gave us touch points of connection that helped us minister to one another in our sorrow.
It Consoles our Humanity.
The same benefit reading aloud offers us in regards to gifting us stories that inspire us holds when we're grieving. Encountering stories of people who face struggle, suffering, disappointment, and death reminds us that we are not alone. I'll never forget that, during this time of initial grief, we read A Place to Hang the Moon for the first time. By the end, we were all in tears (IYKYK). Even though the circumstances of those children were different from ours, we knew they "understood" our hearts.
Grief is part of the human experience, and being steeped in stories that, to greater and lesser degrees, hold up a mirror to our own human suffering is an immense consolation.
It Reminds Us of Our Future Filled with Hope.
Finally, reading aloud reminds us of God's promise that our future is filled with hope! Being immersed in stories that involve difficulty and end with victory or hope keeps our minds set on the things above. These stories remind us that we are more than conquerors through Him Who loves us. Our story is not over, and these stories declare that we will learn how to live with grief as a constant companion and continue to move forward.
Establishing the Habit
If you have not yet begun to read aloud as a family, I'd encourage you to begin! You never know how it will be a comfort to you throughout the peaks and valleys of life. If you're looking for title ideas, we have many Catholic booklists for you!
And if you have experienced the blessing of reading aloud as a family through grief, feel free to share your story with us in the comments!
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